CONSOLATION PRIZES AWARDED AT 1895 WORLD'S FAIR

- wooden nickel

- early model Samsung VHS player

- firm handshake and hefty pat on the back from Nashville's Mayor Kirby

- coupon redeemable for a cowboys and Indians-themed family Christmas card, using an 'image capturing module'

- comforter made by the newest and most desired fabric in the world - polyester

- all-inclusive vacation package for two to the 'New World' - Eerie, PA

- jar of molasses

- a trigon (three-wheeled wagon)

- gun powder horn filled with sweet strawberries and melon hard candies

- one gallon of Hagen Das frozen yolk cream and animal fat swirl

- your unincorporated township will become incorporated and named after your forward-thinking but untimely pharmacological invention - Ambien